AtoZ Challenge

#EverydaySexism #IAmShe

#IAmShe

Asmi’s Journal

25/05/15

 

The more I am trying to raise my voice against an asinine norm of the society, the more faults I’m finding in the system.

Coming across umpteen numbers of incidents on sexism against women is nothing new. What’s surprising is even men aren’t spared. And what’s furious is, this begins right from the childhood of every kid. 

 

We went to a gathering yesterday and were with a couple whose son is three years older to Avni. Another couple joins us and after a while the man asks the little boy ‘hey buddy, so how many girlfriends you have, huh.

Before the boy could answer, Anvi spoke up, ‘my friends’ name is Parth and Ayaam.’

‘Oh ho. Abhi se boyfriends huh. Be careful, Neel’, said the man and the group broke into a laughter.

I had a smile on my face but was burning within and I couldn’t stop myself from retorting.  

‘Hey Sparsh! Why this – Be careful, Neel, at the end? Why can’t a girl have boyfriends? Is it some kind of a milestone meant for only boys? I’m sure you would have applauded had Akshay (the little boy) answered you. Why not the same response for Avni? I don’t understand why we differentiate between our kids from the very beginning? The same question must be for both of them. It’s us who draw the line between a girl and a boy and which just grows within them with their age.’

“Oh, do you know how to put a nail in the wall?’ ‘Let me lift it up, it’s heavy. You can’t.’ ‘Let’s gift a kitchen set to the friend’s daughter. Will make her happy.’

‘Why do we tag women and men? We say we are modern but are we really? You know what Sparsh, this is sexism which we are indirectly teaching our kids. Not just to girls but boys too.’

‘Why are you crying like a girl. Be strong, you’re a boy’. ‘Dude, you’re wearing pink. That’s a guy colour.’ ‘Why are you putting the baby to sleep. Where’s your wife?’

‘I mean really? Please let’s stop this. Let’s give our kids the same upbringing. We should help them be themselves instead of making them a product of our thinking.’

I didn’t realize that I went on and on without a breather. By the time I was finished, I noticed a few more people had joined us. But, I don’t care. I had to say this. Someone had to. Till when will we be quiet and let children get smashed under the pathetic mindsets?

 

‘Woah, Asmi. That was something, buddy. And I agree with you.’ Thankfully the host jumped in and the atmosphere became lighter.

 

But I couldn’t stop my mind from racing even an hour later while returning home. One look at Neel and I knew he’s with me. At least I’m not standing against my dear ones but just the world.

And I made a mental note and a promise- 

I will do anything and everything to save Avni from these bullshit and baseless standards. She will be free to do anything she wants. It’s her life. And if God blesses me with a boy in future, I’ll be more than happy to go against these standards.

Author: rashi mital

A mother and a travel enthusiast, I love speed and am proud of my driving skills. In my free time I love reading, writing, and sometimes doing nothing. I try to live every moment and believe in living young despite the age.

10 Comments on “#EverydaySexism #IAmShe

    1. Oh, that’s so true, Mannat. Only mothers today can bring the change, at least, in their homes. A start anywhere is a start somewhere. Thanks for reading, Mannat. Means a lot, especially considering that I am quite behind in writing and reading too now. 🙂

    1. Wow, Sejal. Hats off to you for the thinking. If every mother of a son thinks like this the world will very soon be a much better place. I am totally sure that you will be a changemaker. Asmi is a fictional character who is born from real people like you. Kudos woman!

  1. Thats the way Rashi. Do set the right standards for your child, irrespective of Gender, and never get them to follow whats baseless Theres everyday sexism in society which is drilled into us on a constant basis. AS a parent we have the oportunity not to expose our children to all these. ..

    1. I agree, Ramya. Our responsibility as parents is much more today than just giving them a good formal education. There are a lot of things we need to teach our kids before they are exposed to adverse things in the external atmosphere. Thanks for reading, Ramya. Means a lot, buddy. 🙂

  2. Superb post. I think aap aur main kisi mele mein kho gaye the! I am also an Incorrigible Feminist like you. I would have raised my voice like you did. I also hope to break gender norms when I have a child. We must fight this dismissive everyday sexism that is widely prevalent everywhere.

  3. I great read to rise above gender bias.

    I have boys and I ensure not to bring in bias when it comes to laying dinner table or cleaning home or wearing pink.
    Why is there a difference when they are our kids and it’s our duty to bring them up equally? why should boys have all the fun girls have all equal rights? Asmi is great. look forward to all your posts with asmi.

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